Well last evening's blog was based on a conversation I had with Rach at about noon yesterday. Right after I posted it, I found out that things had been going downhill all day. The last 24 hours Jimmie has not been eating well at all and his puking has increased again. This morning after an hour of screaming and struggling Rachael got him to take 80mls after which he puked, badly- 3 times. He must of aspirated because he was retracting a bit afterward and had wet sounding cough.
My mom is in Odessa now with Jimmie. Rachael has gone to get the Prevacid and the Bethanecol. Jimmie doesn't seem to be in distress now so that's good. Hopefully these drugs will make a HUGE difference. Pray that's the case and that Jimmie doesn't suffer with any side effects.
And please pray for Rachael. The extreme struggle to get Jimmie to eat and keep him from puking along with pumping, worry, lack of sleep and hormones has really gotten to her. She is sad, angry, depressed and totally understandably exhausted. She's having a really hard time letting go of not being able to breastfeed. She's sad for Jimmie because he wants so badly to be on his back kicking and grooving under his play gym, but everytime she lets him do that he refluxes. If she lets him move free at all he suffers for it. The disapointment and grief that Jimmie was born so early is FINALLY really hitting her. And though she is grateful beyond words at how alive and well he is- she is still very sad. In just 10 months Rachael and Justin lost their firstborn Gracie and then of course Jimmie was born into very dire and traumatic circumstances.
We have decided she needs some intervention in the form of MAJOR help with Jimmie. We are working on a schedule that will include someone being there for Rachael every day. Thankfully this is our last day of dance classes for the summer so I will be able to help a lot. Rachael tends to say she's fine and try and struggle through, but that's not working for her right now- she's falling apart and it's not pretty. Justin needs prayer too because he's trying to work and pay the bills, deal with Jimmie's needs and now Rachael is really needing to be dealt with as well. He is at the end of his rope too. Lots of stress. Anyway- this is sort of a cry for help. And the way you all can help- is pray! Pray that Rachael and Justin can face and deal with the disapointment and hurt over this whole traumatic thing. Pray that God meets them and Rachael can have sweet comfort and communion with Him. Pray that they can have a Holy perspective.
This emotional and psychological crisis has been building for a while with Rachael and since we have shared this journey thus far I want to try to keep being as honest as possible. I know there are many of you who read this blog that have gone through something similar and can relate. And there are also many of you - family and friends who love Rachael, Justin and Jimmie and will intercede for them.
My Dad prayed this scripture for them last night, "...but they who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint." Isa. 40:31
We are so grateful for you all- our warriors!