So no news is good news. After the morning visit with the Doctor there is really nothing new to say. They didn’t check her cervix and it sounds like they don’t plan to this weekend unless there is good reason to.
I’m hoping today is better than yesterday. The best way to describe the “downs” is like I said in the last blog-- storms of fear and despair that blow in. They are triggered by things such as a little bleeding or pain of some sort. Those symptoms could be everything or nothing. By my estimation Rachael had 3 such storms yesterday. It’s utterly exhausting in every way. There is just nothing easy about this. And storms blow in at night as well. Although last night my mom said was the best yet.
Anyway I was up early this morning praying and God brought the story of “Hinds Feet On High Places by Hannah Hurnard- to my mind. Rachael and I wrote and choreographed a ballet based on that book which our students performed beautifully a couple years ago. I realized that Rachael and those of us who are very close to her are Much Afraid and her/our companions are “Sorrow” and “Suffering” and that she/we are standing at the Precipice Injury and that Craven Fear keeps attacking her/us. The precipice seems absolutely impossible to climb, but in the story Much Afraid calls out to the Shepherd and he brings a cordial for Much Afraid to drink called the “Spirit of Grace and Comfort” . . . She drinks it and Sorrow and Suffering tie their bodies to hers with ropes and help her up the Precipice. When she slips they catch her and when she needs to-- she drinks the cordial of Grace and Comfort. In the end of the story Much Afraid makes it to the High Places and the Shepherd gives her a new name “Grace and Glory” and her companions- “Sorrow” and Suffering” have new names- “Joy” and “Peace”.
The Precipice *right now* represents these 3 weeks to viability. 3 weeks until the NICU will really be able to fight for Jimmie’s life. 3 weeks literally seems like an impossible eternity, but I feel like when we get there -- there will be a bit of a break through for Rachael and Justin’s spirits. I also believe we can go far past 24 weeks! So keep praying for that. We can climb this mountain! The Shepherd is with us and is offering us his Grace and Comfort. Please keep praying we and especially Rachael and Justin can receive it!!
And keep praying her bag of water stays strong, that there is no infection and that stitch holds!
This is a battle-- thank you for being our warriors!