Thursday, May 28, 2009

Happy 40 weeks!

Today is Jimmie's due date. TODAY is Jimmie's due date!!!! I had to write it twice because it is so freaking unbelievable. Birthday- Feb. 11th. Due Date- May 28th. Jimmie was born 107 days before he was due, 15 weeks early in the 6th month of pregnancy (the 2nd trimester). We are beyond blessed that he is alive, well and living at home.

Thinking about where we've been there are a lot of feelings, emotions and memories that come up from that day/night in early January when the terrible situation became clear and began progressing. I have found myself reminiscing a lot the last few weeks with mom. Going back through the traumatic moments and just talking about it. It does not feel good to go there, but it does a lot of good in the long run. I always make sure to see "the cross" in those dark memories. To cover them with the blood of Jesus. Ultimately I have faith there will be peace and healing. The miraculous outcome we have had goes a LONG way towards that healing.

It still hurts though. The darkest moment for me was that first night we found out how dire the situation was. There are obviously many many aspects of this journey we've been on that I have not blogged about. Mostly just because- especially in the beginning I was just laying out the facts. And also because in certain situations it was just too much to try to write about it. Beyond words really. I think in the future I'll have more coherent memories that I could list. Much like I did a year after Gracie. It is very therapeutic for me to face these memories. I have discovered if I don't- I get physically ill.

I will tell you though that first night- the absolute gut wrenching pain and horror that it appeared that Justin and Rachael were losing another child after being told 6 days earlier that everything was perfect, was completely overwhelming. The thought that a perfectly healthy little boy might be forced out about 4 weeks too early to breathe was just horrifying. There were many many dark days and nights following that first one that I blogged about only vaguely. Maybe someday I'll share more specifics. It wouldn't be easy to read or write, but one of the truths in life is that your depths of sorrow are met with greater heights of joy. Going from that terrible despair to the amazing joyous miracles we have witnessed has been something that has changed me forever.

Now that Jimmie is 40 weeks our prayer and our hope is that he can develop like a normal newborn. That would be pretty special. Most micro-preemies have developmental delays even after you adjust their age. We are to look at Jimmie like a newborn even though he is 3 1/2 months old. As far as expectations go we are supposed to adjust his age by 15 weeks until he is 2 years old. In most ways he does seem just exactly like a newborn. He definitely does not resemble an almost 4 month old.

So pray for Jimmie that he'll stay healthy. This is SO IMPORTANT, as any kind of sickness can be extremely dire to babies like Jimmie. Also pray for his development and continue to pray your "chunky monkey fat prayers"!

As always- thank you!

Love,
Amber

7 comments:

  1. Chunky Monkey Prayers are coming your way, Jimmie! We thank Jesus Christ every day for this great miracle- Jimmie!
    Lots of prayers and love
    -Mary Gates & Family

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  2. I was just thinking about that this morning that this was Jimmie's due date. What a ride you all have been on! Love the pics you have been posting. I'm so glad you finally got to hold him Amber and that Kenna got to see him. She looked so sweet looking at him. Love you all!

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  3. It is truly in those darkest times that we find the Lord has carried us and drawn us closer to Him. Thank you all for the shining examples you have been to lean on the Lord and to know from where our ultimate joy and strength comes.

    The Tandys

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  4. What a testimony in this little life! The Lord has done so many miracles. It'll be so fun watching him grow up and see what wonderful things the Lord continues to do in his life!

    We love you all!
    Adrian and Janelle

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  5. Auntie Amber,
    You are the best!!!! I am so glad you finally got to hold our little miracle! You have done such an awesome job of keeping everyone posted!
    Love you so much!
    We are so glad he is doing good!
    Love Aunt Suzy and Uncle Lin

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  6. I'm so glad I got to share this journey with your family through this blog. Jimmie truly is a miracle.

    One of the best things I ever did after Sophia was born and then after she came home was to write everything down. Good and bad. It was very cathartic.

    I also still write on every one of her birthdays my feelings of the past year. Someday I will print them out and give them to her. Tomorrow we reach a milestone with her. She graduates from preschool and starts Kindergarten in the fall! I look forward to celebrating that milestone through this blog with Jimmie too!

    Many more prayers and love coming to you all!!

    April and Sophia

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  7. The greatest heights of joy to Jimmie's wonderful family and friends! We will always pray for him. We will never forget his journey. I am a preemie mom who went on strict hospital bed rest at 24 weeks gestation and was able to hold on until 34 weeks. I left the hospital on day 68 and my little boy only spent 8 days in the NICU. The miracle of Jimmie's journey has been an important part of the healing process for our family. Everyone here wants to know how Jimmie is...he's touched so many lives. He reminds us to stay strong. He reminds us of the power of prayer. God is so good! Thank you for sharing his story...and thank you for the updates. We will continue to follow him...
    God bless you.

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